Day 11: Manna Caffe, 12 Waymouth St & Latte 'n' Lunch (now closed), 8 Waymouth St

School holidays are gifts of the public transport gods. Monday morning sees MMC five minutes early, and hovering at the corner of indecisive and Waymouth. With the spankin' new Advertiser lining its Southern flank, Waymouth Street seems to have coffee carte blanche. Not up for white tablecloths at George's, it's a coinflip between Manna Cafe and the newly funkified Latte 'n' Lunch. The cosier choice for a have-here, MMC opts to go incognito inside Manna. The Order: one skinny flat white. The Price: $3.00.

Manna Cafe so almost has character. A ridiculously skinny slice of big-city building, the street-corner entrance strikes MMC as uniquely unAdelaidean.
Shopspace: polished floors / big windows / wooden tables - teetering between haphazard and homely. The Greeting: logistically impossible, with a counter binoculars-far away. After a winding walk to order, an apologetic smile promises coffee pronto. The Service: quick - coffee arrives before friend of MMC does. Tut, tut.

The flat white is apparently an Australian invention. Obvious from its no-nonsense naming, you couldn't order one in Italia. Still, shy of a short black, MMC considers it a serious coffee drinker's order. In format, it is unforgiving. A 'bad' flat white will display all its warts. Burnt coffee will be more than an aromat - its crusty crema will stain. Badly steamed milk will be bold in its bubbliness. An un-pro pour will have customers playing spoon hockey with too-much foam. Today at Manna Cafe, the flat white is served warts 'n' all.

Sigh. As MMC ponders how skim milk can possibly taste so full cream, friend of MMC arrives to take a sour-faced sip. With a Christmas-Friday cup to account for, a bold decision is made. Can we do two cafes in one day? It's pretty radical. Leaving a bitter and unfinished FW in our wake, it's across the laneway to Latte 'n' Lunch.

So recently converted from a 'Kwik n Fresh' that Google Earth isn't up with it, the fact that we have to line up for takeaway is instantly promising. The Shopspace: traces of its supermarket heritage in shiny salad/sandwich display. Furniture is clean and bright. The Service: what's the feminine equivalent of gruff, bitchy? At least we're treated to two staff. The Order: one medium flat white, and one small latte, both skim and takeaway. The Price: hazy memory - $3.20 and $3.90.

Ms Barista barks orders, and we meekly retrieve them unlidded. The Pour: smooth, latte looks lovely. Presentation: different cups - the larger in of-course orange. A streetcorner first sip, and - pah! - it's just not coffee. Flavour: malt 'n' milk. We struggle to identify its special disadvantage. No body? No aroma? We swap cups for a second sip - at least friend of MMC's is stronger. MMC has had the worst of both worlds today.

For the first time, the potential defamatory impact of the blog strikes us. Shattered at the prospect of two more disparaging reviews, MMC gazes glassy-eyed at the Advertiser building. People who work for newspapers in glass houses certainly shouldn't throw stones. Should the lowly blogger?

Turns out defamation and the internet are yet to share many days in court. But on or offline, surely our figurative freedom of speech gives consumers a voice? Not so much. Defamation protects the reputation of companies too, but only the small fry can sue. In SA, small = less than 10 employees, and unrelated to any other corporation. Uh oh. Manna Cafe looks like a friendly little family business...

The lesson: perhaps we should stick to defaming the big guns, but they're not the only ones making bad coffee. Waymouth street, where is the scoop?

The latte word:  Two cups at 2 beans out of 5. First: bitter, second: bathwater. Tomorrow, we're coming to 'a coffee bar' near you for My Morning Coffee.